When you lose someone, the weight of tradition can feel heavy. A formal, somber funeral may not feel right for the person you knew—especially if their spirit was adventurous, passionate, or deeply connected to history and nature.
You are not alone in seeking an alternative. Many families today are opting for a "celebration of life" over a traditional funeral, and they are looking for meaningful, non-religious rituals to structure their goodbye.
Rituals are the bones of a ceremony. They give us a framework for our grief, a way for guests to participate, and a powerful, physical way to say what we feel.
These rituals are the heart of a modern Viking memorial, and they are something you can plan and lead yourself. Here is a practical, how-to guide for five authentic, Viking-inspired rituals you can use to create a beautiful and secular memorial service.
1. The "Valhalla Toast": A Final, Joyful Send-Off
What It Is: The most iconic and accessible Viking-inspired ritual. It is a celebratory toast, led by a family member or friend, to honor the spirit and story of the person who has passed.
Why It's Meaningful: This ritual shifts the tone from mourning to celebration. It’s a collective, joyful recognition of a life well-lived. Instead of a quiet prayer, it is a spirited, spoken "skål" (cheers) to their journey onward, in the spirit of a Viking feast.
How to Do It:
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Prepare the Drinks: Near the end of the memorial, ask guests to gather and fill a cup. This can be mead or ale, or a non-alcoholic option like sparkling cider or apple juice.
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Use a Special Vessel: For the leader of the toast (and perhaps all guests), use ceremonial vessels. An authentic drinking horn is perfect for this, as it adds a tangible, historical element you can feel.
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Lead the Toast: The leader raises their horn and addresses the memory of the loved one. They might say:
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"We are here to honor [Name], a warrior in spirit. They lived with courage and passion. Now, their journey continues. Let us raise our horns and send them on their way with our love. To the traveler! SKÅL!"
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The Response: All guests raise their cups and respond with "SKÅL!" before drinking.
The Valhalla Toast: Ceremonial Viking Mead Cup 6"
2. The Remembrance "Shield Wall": A Collective Story
What It Is: A interactive ritual where guests collectively build a "shield wall" of memories. This becomes a beautiful, physical centerpiece for the memorial service.
Why It's Meaningful: A single eulogy can't capture a whole life. This ritual allows every guest to contribute their unique story, creating a more complete picture of the person. It transforms guests from passive viewers into active participants in the remembrance.
How to Do It:
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Set Up the "Shield": Find a large, round piece of wood or a framed corkboard. You can also simply designate a "memory table" draped with a beautiful memorial banner.
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Provide the "Memories": Set out blank cards or small wooden discs and pens.
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Give Instructions: As guests arrive, invite them to write down a single, specific memory of the person: a funny story, a piece of advice, or a single word that defines them.
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Build the Wall: Have guests pin, tape, or hang their memory cards onto the board or table.
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Present the "Shield": During the ceremony, a speaker can read a few of the memories aloud, explaining that this "shield" represents the full, strong, and complete life of their loved one, built from the love of everyone present.
3. The Candlelight Vigil: A Secular Ritual of Light
What It Is: A simple, powerful, and universally understood secular ritual. It involves the collective lighting of candles to represent the shared light and warmth of the person's memory.
Why It's Meaningful: Fire and light are central to human ceremony. In the darkness of grief, this ritual is a quiet, physical act of community. It creates a peaceful, reflective, and visually stunning moment for guests to pause and remember.
How to Do It:
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Prepare the Candles: You will need one large "Memorial Candle" (placed next to the urn) and many small, unlit candles for the guests.
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Dim the Lights: If indoors, dim the lights to create a respectful atmosphere. This is especially powerful at sunset.
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Share the Light: The host or immediate family lights the central Memorial Candle.
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Pass the Flame: The family members then light their small candles from the Memorial Candle. They turn to the guests in the front row, sharing their flame. Those guests then turn and share the flame with the row behind them, and so on.
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A Moment of Silence: The flame is passed in silence or with soft, secular music playing. Once all candles are lit, the host can invite everyone to hold their light for a minute of shared, silent remembrance before extinguishing them together.
4. The Legacy Planting: A Living Tribute
What It Is: A ritual where a tree, bush, or garden is planted in honor of the loved one, often with the urn or a photo present.
Why It's Meaningful: This ritual is the perfect modern embodiment of Yggdrasil, the great "Tree of Life" from Norse mythology. Instead of a final goodbye, it is an act of beginning. It creates a living memorial—a place the family can return to year after year, to watch a new life grow and flourish from their memory. It is deeply connected to nature and the cycle of life.
How to Do It:
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Choose the Plant: Select a native tree (like an oak, ash, or pine) or a flowering bush that was meaningful to your loved one.
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Choose the "Vessel": The ceremony can be centered around the hand-carved urn, which is placed on a table next to the planting site.
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The Collective Planting: Have a hole pre-dug. Place the tree in the earth.
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Invite Guests to Participate: Place a container of soil and a small trowel next to the tree. One by one, invite guests to come forward, take a small scoop of soil, and add it to the base of the tree. This act physically grounds their grief and lets them "tuck in" their loved one.
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A Final Reading: Once the tree is planted, someone can read a fitting secular poem about nature or legacy.
5. The Final Journey: A Ritual for Scattering
What It Is: A modern, legal, and deeply symbolic alternative to a "boat burial." This is a ritual for the final act of scattering the ashes, giving a "final journey" to the wind or water.
Why It's Meaningful: For many, the idea of a "Viking funeral" is tied to the sea. This ritual honors that spirit. It is an act of release and a return to nature. Using a dedicated scattering tube or biodegradable urn allows for a more dignified, controlled, and respectful process.
How to Do It:
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Choose Your Location (Legally): This is the most important step.
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At Sea: Federal law requires you to be 3 nautical miles from shore.
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Public Parks: National Parks require a Special Use Permit and have specific rules.
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Private Land: You must have the landowner's permission.
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Prepare the Ashes: Transfer the ashes into one or more scattering tubes, Viking burnable boat or a biodegradable water urn before the ceremony. This avoids the difficulty of managing a bag or box in the wind.
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Form a Circle: Have guests gather in a circle or line.
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The Final Words & Scattering: A speaker says a few words about the person's love of freedom, the ocean, or the mountains. The primary family member can then perform the scattering.
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A Flower Tribute: After the ashes are scattered, have guests toss flower petals onto the water or land as a final, beautiful farewell.
Scattering ashes involves important legal rules. Before you plan, read our guide
Build Your Own Memorial
These five rituals are just a starting point. Choose one, or combine all five. You could start with a Candlelight Vigil, build a "Shield Wall" while telling stories, and end with a "Valhalla Toast."
There is no "right" way to do this. The right way is the one that honors their story.
Ready to start planning? Our
The Ultimate Guide to Planning a Modern Viking Memorial
provides the complete framework.
Or, begin gathering your "tools" by exploring our collection
Ceremonial Accessories.